% make fire
Make: Don't know how to make fire. Stop.
% why not?
No match.
% gotta light?
No match.
% How's my lovemaking?
Unmatched '.
% "How would you rate Bush's incompetence?
Unmatched ".
% [Where is Jimmy Hoffa?
Missing ].
% [Where is my brain?
Missing ].
% ^How did the sex change^ operation go?
Modifier failed.
% ^How did the sex change operation go?
Bad substitute.
% If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have?
Too many ('s.
% man: why did you get a divorce?
man:: Too many arguments.
% %blow
%blow: No such job.
% \(-
(-: Command not found.
% sh
$ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense
no sense in pretending!
$ mkdir matter; cat >matter
matter: cannot create
% cd /tmp
% touch this; chmod 000 this
% ln -s /usr/bin/touch U
% U this
U: cannot touch this: no write permission
% rm meese-ethics
rm: meese-ethics nonexistent
% cd ~god
Unknown user: god.
% ar m God
ar: God does not exist
% make love
Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop.
% sleep with me
bad character
% ^What is saccharine?
Bad substitute.
% drink bottle: cannot open
opener: not found
% alias alias alias
alias: Too dangerous to alias that.
% cat catfood
cat: cannot open catfood
% cat "food in cans"
cat: can't open food in cans
% nice man woman
No manual entry for woman.
% man p***y
No manual entry for p***y.
% rm God
rm: God nonexistent
% ar r God
ar: creating God
% Unmatched ".
Unmatched ".
% write desert
desert is not logged on.
% man you
No manual entry for you.
% !bluemoon
bluemoon: Event not found.
% scan for <<"Arnold Schwarzenegger"^J^D
"Arnold Schwarzenegger": << terminator not found
% cat 'the can of tuna'
cat: cannot open the can of tuna
% rm Quayle-brains
rm: Quayle-brains nonexistent
% cat "door: paws too slippery"
cat: cannot open door: paws too slippery
% look into "my eyes"
look: cannot open my eyes
% lost
lost: not found
% make war
Make: Don't know how to make war. Stop.
% mkdir yellow_pages; cat > yellow_pages
yellow_pages: Is a directory
%touch me
%chmod 000 me
%touch me
touch: cannot touch me: permission denied
% ar x "my love life"
ar: my love life does not exist
% ar x "matey, the treasure"
ar: matey, the tresure does not exist
% talk Gorvachev@Kremlin
talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address.
% talk Comrade Khruchev
[Your party is not logged on]
make "bottle open"
make "heads or tails of all this"
make love
make mistake
make sense
man woman
man -kisses dog
% echo
'[q]sa[ln0=aln256%Pln256/snlbx]sb3135071790101768542287578439snlbxq'|dc
GET A LIFE!
% ping elvis.rice.edu | awk '{print substr($1,1,5), $2, $3}'
elvis is alive
% finger
[email protected]
Unknown host
% finger huge-keg-party@big-house
Unknown host
% make ' ' bang ' ' with gun
make: Fatal error: Don't know how to make target ` '
)
