G. Bush - The cleverest President

[Trần Minh Hà (little-flame)]

An aeroplane was about to crash with five people on board but only four parachutes. The first passenger said, ‘I am Kobe Bryant, the best NBA basketball player. The Lakers need me; I can’t afford to die.’ So he took the first pack and left the plane.
The second passenger, Hillary Clinton, said ‘Iam the wife of the former US president, a NY State Senator and a potential future president’ So she took the second pack and jumped out of the plane.
The third passenger, George W Bush, said ‘ I’m the President od the USA. I have great responsibility being the leader od a super-power nation and I am the cleverest President in American history, so America’s people won’t let me die’ So he grabbed the pack nest to him and jumped out of the plane.
The fourth passenger, an old man, said to the fifth passenger a 10-year-old school girl ‘ Iam old and I don’t’ have many years left, and as a Catholic I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.’
The girl said, “It’s ok, there is a parachute left for you. America’s cleverest President has taken my school-bag”

 

[Trần Minh Hà (little-flame)]

While visiting England, G.Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asked her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people.
Bush asks she knows if they’re intelligent.
‘I do so by asking them the right questions,’ says the Queen. ‘Allow me to demonstrate’
Bush watches as the Queen phones Tony Blair and says, ‘ Mr Prime Minister, please answer this question: your mother has a child and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?’
Tony Blair responds ‘It’s me, ma’am’
‘Correct. Thank you and goodbye, sir’ says the Queen. She hangs up and says ‘ Did you get that, Mr Bush?’
Bush nods:’Yes ma’am. Thanks a lot. I’ll definitely be using that!’
Bush, upon returning to Washington, decides he’d better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. Bush summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says ‘Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me’
‘Why, of course, sir, what’s on your mind?’
Bush poses the question: uhh. Your mother has a child and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister.Who is it?’
Helms hems and haws and finally asks, ‘Can I think about it and get back to you?’
Bush agrees, Helms leaves. He immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Collin Powell and explains his problem.
Powell answer immediately’ It’s me of course’
Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House, finds Bush and exclaims ‘ I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It’s Colin Powell!’
And Bush replied in disgust, “wrong, you dumb sh*t, It’s Tony Blair!’