the right questions

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it's a book i read, the book starts with "ten essential question to guide you to an extraordinary life".(im trying to make it short, so there'd maybe some unintentionally mistakes in my interpretation which is always bad >__<, i just wanna say that it is a good and useful book, i just wanna share its ideas with u)
It talks about how important of our choices are because they are what determine our lives, distinguish us from others. It is the most precious gift that we have, to make a decision, or decisions for ourselves. Before making any choices, it won't harm u to ask urself these questions and consider them:
1- Will this choice propel me toward an inspiring future or will it keep me stuck in the past?
Making choices that support our dreams gives us a tremendous sense of empowerment and self-esteem; we live a life that progresses toward what we dream of will make us feel powerful, confident, hopeful, and joyful.
Our fear of expanding taking risks causes us to believe that our dreams are unrealistic or out of reach, it convinces us that we should be happy with what we've got. However, when we give up hope and stop believing in ourselves ,a part of begins to die by depriving ourselves of our right to dream, to remember what we truly desire, we slowly lose our connection to even our inner self, and a stressful life and depression is hard to avoid.
There is no middle ground, u either are moving forward or backward; because every choice, however small it seem to be, it will lead us to a particular direction; even decide to do nothing at all, it is still is a choice.
Usually failure is not caused by a single mistake. Failure is the inevitable result of repetitive of poor judgment and choices in every day. Many of our behaviors go unrecognized, not only by ourselves but also by those around us, thus we assume they just don’t matter, nevertheless, they do; no action no matter how small or seemingly inconsequential goes unnoticed. Even if we think we're getting away with something, the universe knows the truth. and deep down inside us, so do we. We can go on fooling ourselves that we are headed in the direction of a happy life, but the state of our current life (a satisfied or unsatisfied, fulfilled or unfulfilled life, do u feel this life is just hell and u just want today just gone pass etc) reflects the truth about our choices.
Taking risk to follow our hearts gives energy to our future, breathes life into our dreams. And by stopping and asking ourselves if what we are doing is leading us toward in inspiring future or away from it, we gain the opportunity to remember our visions for our lives.
If u make a wrong turn in ur life, stop, ask ur self this question in order to make a new choice, a choice that can deliver u the life u desire.
(9 other questions, i'll post later if this topic is in ur interest)
 
i really want to write about this topic in vietnamese, but couldn't find any corresponding place, ('cuz one of the rule says that the writting will be removed if it is posted in the wrong place)....can u guys and girls help me out...thank u
(however, i'm never good at translating, but i'll give it a try)
 
so the 1st question is about one's ability to make decision and take risk, rite? Correct me if I'm wrong, you are trying to say that we all should think positively towards the future. It's no use crying over spilled milk.
Also, failure is not fatal but failing to change is. So never stop questioning yourself in order to realize when you gotta change, rite?
I think no one would disagree with you. However, can you give some examples, I mean, be more specific?

Por ejemplo, if your relationship with someone got worse, should you question urself n change the way you are? Or should you just live the way you want, be who you are and soon enough, that person will understand?
 
oh, and btw, this is a good place to post st like that. Box thảo luận nghiêm túc is just not as cool :))
 
what u are talking about is more related to the second question:
2- is this an act of faith, or is it an act of fear.
Every choice is guided by one of the 2 places :either it is an act of faith, which will lead us to a new future (maybe good, maybe bad), it allows us to take new things.
(the author, she says a lots of positives about faith like it gives us the ability to look beyond our immediate circumstances and imagine brave new choices for the future; it gives us strength, the confidence, the feeling that we are taken care of, the feeling of not being alone, but shone by love)
On the other hand is fear, fear of the unknown future, fear of abandonment., fear of rejection, fear that life wont bring us what we want or think we need, fear that we try and fail, or maybe if we do succeed, we’ll feel guilty about what we’ve done and won’t be able to handle it, or fear that our lives will become unmanageable and we will lose ourselves etc..., all these fears and more keep us trapped repeating the same old pattern and making the same choices over and over again. Fear prevents us from moving outside the comfort, and even familiar discomfort (fear of even worse discomfort).
Example (I choose this example according to Huong’s question): Leslie (this is a real person in real life, and real event, the author asked her permission to write about her event as an example), she wanted to have a loving, nurturing relationship more than anything else; and recently she had met someone who appeared to be the perfect man. Even though, Jacob wasn’t really her type, but he has some points that she liked, he was emotionally available, loving, honest and committed. For months, Leslie tried to be more open to have the relationship work out. She had spent years in and out of different relationships, and felt that she had finally come to a place where she could settle. But after eight months with Jacob, she was discontent and torn inside because she so desperately wanted to work it out. The question she kept asking herself was “is there something wrong with me, or is he just not the one”. She went to the author and was asked to closed her eyes and write down what faith would say (positive future)
“Faith would say “I can trust there is a bigger plan for me even though I can’t see it”
“faith would say “let go”
“faith would say “there is someone who will love me and care for me more deeply than Jacob, who is really my type”
and they Leslie was asked to do the same thing, but this time, what would fear say (worse future)
fear would say “I wont find anyone better”, ‘I’ll wind up all alone if I don’t stay with Jacob’, “there must be something wrong with me that prevents me from making long-term relationships work”, “hold on to Jacob, because having someone is better than having no one.
When Leslie was done writing her list, she clearly saw that she stayed with Jacob was all because of fear, Leslie recognized that one of the reasons all her relationships ended so badly because fear has kept her staying to those unwanted relationship and the result just wounded both her and her partner.
(a long example), but u should do the same thing, ask urself, the book don’t give us the answer, it only gives us the guidance to look for a good solution. The decision is always up to us. We are the master of our lives^^
 
what's about the question 3, I am looking foward to it!
If this is an Ebook, can u share it?
 
Interesting question!

Faith is trust. You are sitting in a chair, and have faith that it won't drop you to the floor. Trust is established through experience. At some point you were introduced to chairs, and learned that (except in rare occasions) they won't let you down!
Faith is the total complex of one's ideals, principles, and beliefs regarding all fundamental matters of life and the self. Faith lives in our cognitions about religious teachings or doctrines!

Fear is an emotion experienced in anticipation of some specific pain or danger .

What exactly is fear? Fear is a personal reaction to something? Is still real although invisible, its actually something that we create ourselves, hence ' we have nothing to fear, but fear itself'. The closer you look at fear or rather the image that has symbolized your fear, begins to get smaller and smaller until you are left with the root problem which step by step can be dealt with.

How can they relate to each other? Is it an act of faith, or is it an act of fear??? It is an act of faith because it will lead us to a new future , to discover and hope for something new... But there is a fear, "fear of the unknown future, fear of abandonment., fear of rejection, fear that life wont bring us what we want or think we need, fear that we try and fail, or maybe if we do succeed, we’ll feel guilty about what we’ve done and won’t be able to handle it, or fear that our lives will become unmanageable and we will lose ourselves etc..., "
 
faith and fear are just our thoughts, through rationalization(could be realistic, could be romantic)...it is just a possitive and negative side of a matter...faith is the belief that if we change, things'd be better, but fear is the thought that changes would only make things worse...
sometimes fear helps us from doing something stupid, sometimes faith really leads to a screwed up position, who knows...but the thing is, which is the whole purpose of the book...is to help people to live a life that u'r destined to live....a life with passion rather than just play-safe type of life...
it depends on people, 'cuz only they have the answer for themselves...the book is just like a guidance, how to apply it...it's all up to them...however sometimes it works for some people but not others, sometimes, it works in some circumstances but not in others.
 
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let's me just put all the questions....so if u have any questions about them, i'll gladly answer u.
Will this choice propel toward an inspiring future or will it keep me stuck in the past?
Will this choice bring me long-term fulfillment or will it bring me short-term gratification?
Am I standing in my power or am I trying to please another?
AM I looking for what's right or am I looking for what's wrong?
Will this choice add to my life force or will it rob me of my energy?
Will I use this situaton as a catalist to grow and evolve or will i use it to beat myself up?
Does this choice empower me or does it disempower me?
Is this an act of self-love or is it an act of self-sabotage?
Is this an act of faith, or is it an act of fear?
Am I choosing from my divinity or am I choosing from my humanity?
(some of the questions are kinda mean the same thing, but they're quite different after i've read it...but not a whole lot...'cuz as i said, the whole book has only one purpose...)
 
Can you tell more specifically about the Choice here?

What kind of choice are you talking about?
 
specific choices?...it depends on wat kind of situation u'r talking about...
u always have choices (except the one that when u'r aged and dying)...

I take the example of my post #5...Leslie has choices...either to dump the guy and move on, or just keep the relationship going, or she can make the guy to change etc

Or when u choose wat major for ur college...u have choices, either go for a high-demand job or the job that u want, or the job that ur dad wants u to go etc...which college u want to go to, u have choices....u can choose the one near ur home, or far from home...in the state, or out of state, abroad...etc....

i don't know if i did answer ur question or not, can u be more specific about ur point...it'll help me a lot...thank u
 
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